WEEK 76: LESSONS FROM TUTU

PLANNING (Implementation Intention):  You will follow through 2X to 3X more likely to complete your weekly task than you normally would just by filling in the following statement.

I plan to complete the weekly task [day] at [time] in [location]. 

A reminder you might have to use multiple Implementation Intentions in order to follow through.

EXECUTION (strategies used):  From week to week, I use a combination of many strategies. There are always some which are used more than others depending on what comes up, but I wanted to offer a link to all them at once. 

My advice is to identify the I CAN'T statement you tell yourself during the most. Then find a strategy below the statement which resonates with you, and then start using it. 

Enjoy!

STRATEGY LIST

REFLECTIONS (learnings and actions): Last week I shared a quote from Eben Pagan about Inevitable Thinking, who said:

Inevitable Thinking is thinking and acting as if what you are doing is a forgone conclusion because you set up the conditions for it to happen.

The idea of "Inevitable Thinking" has been an integral of the Leap Year process, I just did not know how to phrase it. For example, I knew for a fact I was going to create something meaningful, but had no idea I would be able to accomplish the following things in the last year and a half:

-55,000+ words written in first manuscript

-Identified a purpose in life

-Learned over 25+ strategies to overcome procrastination

-Launched first app

-Selected to join a highly selective entrepreneur program

-Landed jobs at our dream school

-And many more

Did I doubt it? I did in the beginning of the process, but my confidence grew and doubt turned to certainty every week I complete the weekly tasks.  This is what Eben Pagan calls the "conditions" which allow you make this happen. 

This learning was huge, but it came in the middle of some bad news as well. I was informed last week that my Great Grandmother was facing some really bad health issues. Thus, Meggo and I decided that I should go back and see her before anything happened. 

Now to give some context, my Great Grandmother's name is Marge Grett, but I have always called her Tu Tu. She is currently 97, and has lived through two world wars, the Great Depression, and started a multi-million dollar dairy business with 1000 acres of land, 20+ workers, and millions of dollars of revenue from milk and livestock. She married my Great Grandfather when she was quite young and actually milked 5 cows on their honeymoon. 

I remember I would go to her house every Sunday to eat all of her left overs when I was younger. Little did I know that this would be the beginning of some of the greatest life lessons I would learn. To be honest it was all about the food at first, as she made everything from scratch. Pies, cookies, mashed potatoes...whatever she cooked was absolutely delicious. 

I am not sure when it happened, but Tu Tu started to share small bits about her life experiences during those Sundays. From bartering milk and butter for groceries and washing an entire house with one bucket of water during the Great Depression are just a few of the stories she shared with me. They had such a profound effect on me that I wrote my college essay on the all the lessons I learned from her. 

This week I had the opportunity to have 2-3 hours per day of interrupted time with her for four straight days. It was simply perfect! I thanked her for all the times she helped me in my life, such as cooking breakfast for me every day before elementary school and buying furniture for my house when I moved to Los Angeles. I left nothing out. Additionally, I was able to show her pictures and videos of all the places I have been lucky to travel to. This spurred conversation about family, love, and life. We shared many great memories. Furthermore, I shared with her The Leap Year process, how it started and where it is today.

I mentioned earlier the idea of "Inevitable Thinking" and I made a connection to Tu Tu as I continued to talk to her during the week. She did not have a lot of choices growing up and 

was forced into a tough situation when she married my Great Grandfather, but the result of providing for her family and creating a successful dairy farm was a forgone conclusion. The how she might not have known right away, but she set up the conditions (tremendous work ethic and a never give up attitude) to help them reach their goal. 

They passed their tremendous work ethic and never give up attitude to their kids, and them to their kids. Thus I realized that a lot of the traits I have learned and cultivated in the Leap Year process, were planted from the lessons TuTu has taught me. 

Tu Tu had been laying the groundwork for the Leap Year process before it even started. Now, the beauty is you do not need an amazing great grandmother to teach you these lessons (awesome if you do!), as this is what the Leap Year process will do. It will help foster "Inevitable Thinking" amongst other tools, to help you setup the conditions for you to believe that achieving your dreams is a forgone conclusion. 

What Went Well?

Traveling, no set schedule, yet the weekly task completed. 

What is something we can improve? What actions can we take next week?

Appreciate more, and expect less. We can all have high expectations, but have less attachments to the results, as their is always something we can appreciate.

What is something to avoid next week?

Expect everything to turn out a specific way, and get upset if they do not.  

WEEK 75: 100% COMMITMENT, NOT MERELY INTERESTED

PLANNING (Implementation Intention):  You will follow through 2X to 3X more likely to complete your weekly task than you normally would just by filling in the following statement.

I plan to complete the weekly task [day] at [time] in [location]. 

A reminder you might have to use multiple Implementation Intentions in order to follow through.

EXECUTION (strategies used):  From week to week, I use a combination of many strategies. There are always some which are used more than others depending on what comes up, but I wanted to offer a link to all them at once. 

My advice is to identify the I CAN'T statement you tell yourself during the most. Then find a strategy below the statement which resonates with you, and then start using it. 

Enjoy!

STRATEGY LIST

REFLECTIONS (learnings and actions): This week I wanted to write about a connection I made with being 100% committed. 

I first learned this from Dane Maxwell and Andy Drish from The Foundation. They said 

...being 100% committed is easy, while being 99% is $%^&*.

This connects to what I read in Medium this week and the quote comes from John Asaraf. He says 

If you are interest, you come up with stories, excuses, reasons, and circumstances about why you can't or why you won't. If you're committed, those go out the window. You just do whatever it takes.

I have to be honest and say I was just interested when I started the Leap Year process, but now am fully committed. It has taken me well over 52 weeks to get to this point, but I know for a fact I will complete my weekly task no matter what challenges life presents me. 

For example, this week my beautiful daughter was born on Sunday. We were well taken care of (diapers changed, baths given, and around the clock help) so we could focus on welcoming our newest member to the family. This help was amazing, but we were restrained to a room in a hospital for three and a half days. Additionally, the nurses would come in every three hours to ensure we, my wife, was feeding Elea to stabilize her weight. The room did have internet, but could only be accessed on our cellular devices. Thus, I was not able to connect using my laptop...somewhat of a problem, as I write daily from it. 

In the past, the thought of 3.5 days without my laptop would have stressed me out, but I just embraced the situation and took it as an opportunity to support Megan and hold Elea for hours at a time.

We arrived home on Thursday and started to acclimate to not having around the clock help. Additionally, I learned my great grandmother has some serious health issues the same day. Thus, I was trying to figure out how I could get home to see her. All of this while, not sleeping on a regular schedule to help Megan with Elea.

The amazing part is I have been consistent with the Leap Year process for 75 weeks now, and this has lead me to harness the power of "Inevitability Thinking." I read this from the same article in Medium and it was coined by Eben pagan, business visionary, who said

Inevitable Thinking is thinking and acting as if what you are doing is a forgone conclusion because you set up the conditions for it to happen.

I am now at a point where completing the weekly task and fulfilling my commitment to the Leap Year process is a"forgone conclusion."  

Now has this been easy, no! However, I have learned the true difference between being 100% committed and being merely interested. So let me ask you are you committed to achieving your dreams or are you just interested? 

Victor Frankl said 

He who has a WHY to live for can bear almost any how. 

I can guarantee you can create meaningful change in your life and achieve your dreams using the Leap Year process, but know it will require you to be 100% committed, not merely being interested. 

So are you ready to take steps to achieving the amazing? Then commit and know the outcomes will be a "forgone conclusion." 

What Went Well?

Weekly task completed in the face of overwhelming daily challenges. Harnessing the power of Inevitably Thinking. 

What is something we can improve? What actions can we take next week?

Aware of when we do not get enough sleep. This will help you avoid snapping at individuals unnecessarily. 

What is something to avoid next week?

Trying to control every outcome of every situation. In the words of Mihaly csikszentmihalyi, Flow do not resist. 

WEEK 74: IN MOMENTS OF DECISIONS DESTINY IS SHAPED

PLANNING (Implementation Intention):  You will follow through 2X to 3X more likely to complete your weekly task than you normally would just by filling in the following statement.

I plan to complete the weekly task [day] at [time] in [location]. 

A reminder you might have to use multiple Implementation Intentions in order to follow through.

EXECUTION (strategies used):  From week to week, I use a combination of many strategies. There are always some which are used more than others depending on what comes up, but I wanted to offer a link to all them at once. 

My advice is to identify the I CAN'T statement you tell yourself during the most. Then find a strategy below the statement which resonates with you, and then start using it. 

Enjoy!

STRATEGY LIST

REFLECTIONS (learnings and actions): This week I wanted to discuss what I learned about "thorns." What are thorns? 

I read this from Medium and it was written by Benjamin Hardy. Below is an excerpt from his post:

In the book The Untethered Soul, Michael Singer provides the example of a man with a thorn in his arm. When anything touches the thorn, this man feels excruciating pain. Consequently, the man re-organizes every aspect of his life to protect the embedded thorn from being touched. 

Most of us live our lives in a similar fashion. Our thorns are emotional. Thus, most people build their entire lives around the parts of themselves they are unwilling to face. It is only accepting that your problems are emotional that you can begin the process of moving beyond your emotions. Psychologist call this process and skill emotional regulation. Put simply it is living healthy with your emotions - good or bad.

Now what is root of uncomfortable feelings? I have learned it is uncertainty. Uncertainty of the future. Uncertainty of the outcomes. This lack of clarity is the cause of uncomfortable feelings. Which in turn produce the emotions of doubt, anxiety, and fear, or what Michael Singer calls "thorns." 

In previous posts, I wrote about cultivating your Soft Zone, or the ability to sit with, observe, and use uncomfortable feelings to your advantage. This corresponds to what psychologists call emotional regulation. The path to your dreams will be hazy and unclear at times. What you expected to be a straight path becomes a system of many turns. It is in these times, where doubt and uncomfortable feelings will creep in. Do not fight them, but be aware of them and know they are a natural part of taking on worthwhile endeavors. Just take a deep breath, sit with these emotions and focus on how you can get to the next step. This will allow you to assess the situation and ask better questions.

Know you are on the right path if you feel the thorns, uncomfortable feelings, produced from uncertainty. Cultivate your Soft Zone, make definite decisions, and take actions which will move you forward

Tony Robbins has said "It is in your moments of decision that your destiny is shaped." So do not let uncertainty and the negative emotions it causes cripple you, rather, use it as a means to decide which actions to take next in order to achieve your dreams!

What Went Well?

Weekly task completed and continuing to cultivating the Soft Zone.

What is something we can improve? What actions can we take next week?

Do not rush into a situation. Ask advice, do your research, and then make your decision. 

What is something to avoid next week?

Doing the same thing over and over again, expecting different results.

WEEK 73: FOCUS ON THE PRINCIPLES

PLANNING (Implementation Intention):  You will follow through 2X to 3X more likely to complete your weekly task than you normally would just by filling in the following statement.

I plan to complete the weekly task [day] at [time] in [location]. 

A reminder you might have to use multiple Implementation Intentions in order to follow through.

EXECUTION (strategies used):  From week to week, I use a combination of many strategies. There are always some which are used more than others depending on what comes up, but I wanted to offer a link to all them at once. 

My advice is to identify the I CAN'T statement you tell yourself during the most. Then find a strategy below the statement which resonates with you, and then start using it. 

Enjoy!

STRATEGY LIST

REFLECTIONS (learnings and actions): I wanted to share a connection I made this week which will help you in times when you have to make tough decisions on the path to achieving your dreams.

I have now been working in The Foundation program, a course which teaches you to start a software program from scratch, for about eight months. It was created by Dane Maxwell and Andy Drish, who are both multi-million dollar software entrepreneurs. The overall program is scheduled to take six months, but I have been juggling The Foundation along with the Leap Year process, so it has taken me a tab bit more.  

I am nearing the end of the modules and I heard something this week which was timely, but also blew me away. In the video Dane talks about the growth which had to occur to get to this point in the program. He then highlights one of the greatest skills to have as an entrepreneur. Open mindedness.

You might think marketing, coding, or sales might be the best skill to posses but Dane disagrees. Why does he say being OPEN MINDED trumps them all? Simple answer, it allows you to DROP DISBELIEF. How often do we take on something meaningful and then make excuses, procrastinate, or even quit at the first sign of being uncomfortable? Or even worse, we don't even start as we tell ourselves we could never do that, there is no way!

The skill of being OPEN MINDED is easy to say, but I found this week it is quite hard to apply. Someone once said the older you get, the less you know. This is so true as I remember doing things without thinking twice when I was a kid. No fear, full charge ahead! Where as now, I often stop myself in trying things as I tell myself I have already done that or that is not possible from the accumulation of all my past experiences.  

Additionally, I have learned the enemy to being OPEN MINDED is uncertainty. Disbelief arises from this lack of clarity and questions like, "What will happen, when will it happen, and how will it happen?" run through your mind. Next, doubt and fear creep in and stop you from taking action. 

I read something from Medium this week which can help reverse the crippling effect of fear of the unknown. Dr. Stephen R. Covey said "We control our actions, but the consequences that flow from those actions are controlled by principles."

For example, your body is governed by principles and will become unhealthy if you only consume unhealthy foods. Your finances are governed by principles and you will become in debt if you spend more than you have. You control the action, but the consequences that follow are governed by PRINCIPLES.

So what are principles? Principles are the compound effect of daily decisions. Doing something one time, like drinking a beer or smoking a cigarette, will not have a damaging effect on your health. Where as, these activities done over a extended period of time can cause major health problems. 

Thus if you want to create better outcomes, then improve the daily decisions you make, thus creating a positive compound effect. 

Back to what I wanted to answer at the beginning of the post. How can you make tough decisions on the path to your dreams? In life we are presented with situations of such size, that we have no idea what to do. Naturally, we feel this way, as we have no idea of the outcome. This uncertainty allows doubt, judgement, and fear to creep in and makes it difficult to have even one clear thought. You create Pro and Con lists, you talk to family and friends, you replay every scenario out in your mind, and what you thought was clear becomes muddy. 

This is where you can become OPEN MINDED and DROP THE DISBELIEF. What happened in the past or whatever terrible thing you see for the suture do not have power on what you can do NOW! Remember, outcomes are governed by principles. You can control you actions in any given moment, thus if you want to create a positive outcome, put in the consistent work to create this result. These efforts will be compounded exponentially, the growth you make will help you produce more growth, and help you achieve things never thought possible! 

Thus, be OPEN MINDED, DROP THE DISBELIEF, and focus on the principles (daily actions and decisions) to achieve amazing outcomes!

What Went Well?

Weekly task completed in the face of developing two softwares and making a HUGE life decision. 

What is something we can improve? What actions can we take next week?

Presence. Not thinking about all the things in the past, or what could happen in the future. Having the focus to stay in the moment and enjoy the present moment.

What is something to avoid next week?

Living outside the moment.