Small avalanches start with small shifts. Pamela McFarland Walsh
REFLECTIONS (learnings and actions): Today I want to share something that can one, help you accelerate your progress, or two, STOP you dead in your tracks.
First, I want you to start by thinking about two distinct examples.
The first involves drawing a line from point A, then zigging a little, and then zagging a little more, but eventually getting to a point B.
Although not straight, there are no major deviations which makes the journey from point A to point B any longer than it needs to be.
Now, the second example I want you to start by imaging drawing a line from point A, then making a huge, exaggerated horizontal line that extends a far distance, and eventually STOPS at another point.
Question, how do these two examples relate to how we deal with situations which are presented to us on the path to achieving goals, success, and our dreams?
Well, we first have to talk about the idea of Negative Feedback (NF) and Excessive Negative Feedback (ENF). Understanding the difference between the two will either one, accelerate your progress in achieving any goal or milestone, where as the other, will deter you or even worse, STOP you dead in your tracks.
Negative Feedback, or NF, is something that occurs daily. It does not matter if you are uber successful or an average joe. Everyone is presented with situations in the form of NF.
What separates the successful and the other 99% of the planet is how they respond to them.
Most people, me being one of them for many years, considered NF as bad and would continuously think about them to the points that they consumed me. In turn, it would cause me to make decisions that would derail any progress I had made or STOPPED me from taking action forward.
It is like the second example, where I would obsess over the NF and it caused me to make huge, exaggerated horizontal movements which slowed me down from getting from point A to point B. Or even worse, it allowed me to believe what I was doing was wrong, and that I should STOP altogether.
I have found the problem occurs when we are not able to assess the situation correctly. Or, we are not able to separate FACT from opinion. Thus it gives our cerebral mechanism (our brains) false information to act from. Thus, we end up making huge, exaggerated horizontal movements which cause stress, frustration, and opens up room for the killer of all dreams to come in...DOUBT.
For example, losing weight.
You decide to get back into shape (a majority of the planet is doing currently...actually most are quitting the gyms now) and lose X number of pounds.
You are inspired and motivated at the beginning and even have results to show for your work. Then something happens. Your boss yells at you, your kids scream mercilessly for an hour...life!
Stress creeps in, you stop thinking clearly, and eat one cookie. Your intuition provides NF to tell you no, and that need to change what you are doing.
This is where you have TWO options...one will help you accelerate towards achieving your goals, and the other will take you three steps backwards.
1. You take a moment and separate FACT from opinon. Does what your boss said have any merit? Can you use it to your advantage at all? Were your kids sick? Did they get their finger pinched? Can they even communicate?
Then, choose to make a small modification to autocorrect and get back on track. Thus, do not eat the next cookie or say you deserve a cheat meal.
2. You obsess over the NF and turn it into Excessive Negative Feedback, or you are TOO sensitive to the NF which is being presented to you and it consumes you.
Well I ate that one cookie, might as well eat one more. Also, I have been doing so well, I deserve a treat. Also, this is why diets don't work. There is too much stress to think about eating the right foods. Also, making time for exercise....
On and on, until you let the dream killer in...DOUBT.
That is why I can't do diets. That is why I have never succeeded. There is no use!
What ensues is you allow yourself that cheat meal. That turns into a cheat day. Cheat weekend. Cheat week. Cheat....(Huge exaggerated, horizontal movements from your goals).
A week later you decide to give up becuase you think what you are doing is wrong (illusion) and STOP altogether.
This vicious cycle plays on repeat and you struggle to find the CLARITY on why you can NOT make progress, achieve your goals, success or your dreams.
Crazy, but I see it all the time.
So here is the thing, do you want to commit and make sustainable change in your life? Do you want to achieve your goals? Do you want massive success? Do you want to live the life of yoru dreams?
Yes...
Then consider the following:
1. The path to achieving anything worthwhile will be filled with situations that provide constant NF.
2. You can use NF to steer you.
or
You can turn it into ENF which will consume you and make you take actions which cause huge exaggerated, horizontal movements away from your goals.
You can do this,
J
Top three activities that move me forward?
1. TMM...creating my shield for the day!
2. Listening to Audible and Life Coach podcast.
3. Recalibration...it is needed to help stay focused.
Biggest lessons and learnings?
Need to recalibrate everytime you reach a goal, in order to keep you moving. A reminder a bike only stays in balance in motion, not standing still.
What are you grateful for?
Having a rock solid morning process in place that shields me from all the stresses and frustrations from the day!
-----
PLANNING (Implementation Intention): You will follow through 2X to 3X more likely to complete your weekly task than you normally would just by filling in the following statement.
PLANNING (Implementation Intention): You will follow through 2X to 3X more likely to complete your weekly task than you normally would just by filling in the following statement.
I plan to complete the weekly task [day] at [time] in [location].
A reminder you might have to use multiple Implementation Intentions in order to follow through.
EXECUTION (strategies used): From week to week, I use a combination of many strategies. There are always some which are used more than others depending on what comes up, but I wanted to offer a link to all them at once.
My advice is to identify the I CAN'T statement you tell yourself during the most. Then find a strategy below the statement which resonates with you, and then start using it.
Enjoy!
No comments:
Post a Comment